Hello Jessica!


Strange things  have been happening of late…

I have been trying to balance life and work-while keeping my interests high, both spiritually and investigatory. It seems every time I turned on the TV this week, the main character’s name was Charley. A show where a man was murdered- Charley. A show where someone was lost-Charley. A show where somebody had lost their best friend-Charley. I mentally said, “Hello Charley…long time no hear.” But thanked him for his presence. The white dog chattered up a storm that night with someone in my office-Charley.

Yesterday I talked about this case with someone close to me- testified to divine intervention and mentioned the recent events about Charley and how I had received a random email from someone named Roxanne something. I laughed and noted that Jessica had not reached out in quite sometime. Sent her a mental hug and asked if I could be of service to her. I finished work and then suddenly decided I needed a change. So, I decided to go and get my hair cut. Conversations broke out between myself and the hairdresser and soon  I began to discuss the book. As the young woman was cutting my hair, a customer addressed someone at the register by the name of “Jessica” and I watched as the young woman who was cutting my hair bobbed in response. She had light brown hair, medium build and just the right age. I began to laugh and then explained that she resembled my ‘Jessica.’ Then the woman at the register said her name was Jessica too! You gotta love the way this all works.

When I got home, I decided after a week of chaos and moving children and caring for in-laws to set my house in order and ready for the ensuing holidays. I did laundry -vacuumed -mopped floors and then dusted. As I did so, I dusted several photos of my parents- hugged them and shed a tear…not out of dire need, but out of sentimental want. I am a 55 year old orphan who misses her parents in the same way that my children now miss me. I whispered to my father that I should have spent more time with him- said I hated that my mother felt the need to go- but understood her need to stop hurting. All in all- it was about love and letting go and holding on. I asked her to to drop by sometime- say a quick hello so I could tell her how much I love her and she did.

Last night my mother came to me in a dream and I did so- I told her everything that had been happening and how I felt. We talked, we walked- she hugged my neck and kissed me on the cheek. I told her I missed her…and then a phone call pierced my consciousness and she was gone. It was 2:08 in the morning and my mother in law had fallen and could not get off the floor. Tired, I crawled from the bed and my husband and I dressed and drove the hour plus to help her and then back home.

Had she come to warn me? Or had she just decided to remind me that, just as I had been there to help her- my help was now needed by someone else and that I should go to her with the same compassion and empathy and make her last years as comfortable as possible. With each mile, I thought of my mother. Felt her warm cheek beside my own and thought…what wonderful gift has befallen me through Charley. In the last two days I had heard from Roxanne, Jessica and Charley several times, reminding me that I had connected and made a difference in the life and after life of those who the universe has so kindly placed in my path.

When I got home it was after 5:30 in the morning. My husband and I fell asleep and I had the most distressful dream. we were driving home from somewhere, when suddenly the earth began to give way and the bridge we were about to cross began to crumble under the wheels of our car. The concrete broke in huge great chunks that crashed to a vegetated valley below. The scene and the feeling was horrific as we careened over the jagged edge of what was left of an overpass and into the air. Helpless I held onto the steering wheel and we prayed and said our goodbyes. Below, other vehicles  and bloodied bodies lay matted against the green and gray of the shards of concrete and grassy knolls. For a minute I passed out, then found myself dragging my husband’s body from the wreckage of our car. We wandered for a mile, following other survivors and made it to a small roadside restaurant- where hundreds of people were trying to treat the injured and supply them with water and coffee. Some asked me what had happened and I told them about the earth shaking and the falling bridge and when they asked which bridge I gave a name and then was corrected…

“It was something like, the Vandiver Bridge I think…” In truth, I had not really paid attention and then a lady behind me corrected; “No… it wasn’t called the Vandiver- it was Sanders.

Those of you who have read the book can figure out the connection.

Somebody has finally come to the end of their road. Could it be me… or could it be someone else?

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